Why Team Alignment is So Important

photo credit: chewonki_mcs via flickr CC

Earlier this week, I had the blessing of sharing a brief talk on alignment with our entire team at Awana. Here are my notes, rewritten with some of the organizational nuances removed, for easy readability. I know this content challenged me as I wrote it; I hope it helps you as you read.

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Ultimately, friends, the question before us is “what does it look like for us to be aligned?” We’ve talked much lately about the concepts of us being a global organization. We’ve talked much lately about our need to ensure that our message matches our mission. For the sake of the future, alignment is the key. But why?

Noah Movie: Worth All The Buzz?

 

It seems like there’s plenty of chatter about the worth of the new Noah movie releasing this weekend. Individuals on all sides of the theological and practical spectrum seem to be talking about whether or not it’s an abuse of scripture and how much “artistic liberty” director Darron Aronofsky took. Excited to watch the film based on the trailer alone, Robyn and I went out last night and saw it. We both left scratching our heads and taking quite a bit of time to process our thoughts. I’m not a Biblical scholar or a quality movie critic, so take these comments for what they’re worth – neither a full movie review of a verse-by-verse dissection of what is real and what is fake.

Here are the three big thoughts that resonated with me after watching Noah. [I’ll do my best to avoid signficant spoilers here, but be forewarned. It’s hard to give a legitimate take on the film without sharing some of what rolls out.] 

Cognition Meets Action: What I’m Learning From my Five-Year-Old

Creative Commons. flickr user TZA.

Raising a kid can be tough. Raising two can be tougher. (I know what you’re thinking… “thanks for the newsflash.”) All standard reality aside, my wife and I are currently in the throes of the emotional stages of parenting our almost-six and just-over-two year old girls. Most of the time, things are a total joy and we absolutely adore these kiddos. Yet, at the very same time, day-to-day life can be challenging and we spend many an hour discussing what we’re doing right, what we’re doing wrong, what’s up with our kids, and what to do about it.

Current issue deals with our eldest — what she listens to, what she follows up on, what she seems to get distracted by, etc. We often find ourselves simply asking the question, “Is this normal for a five-year old?” “Is there something we should be doing differently?” So after a bit of soul-searching and some super-rudimentary research, here are a few things I’m learning to conclude:

1. The cognitive development of a kid should not be overlooked.

Modern brain science tells us a lot about what kids are and are not capable of. Physicians and scientists tell us that the brain is not fully formed until the early to mid-20’s. And the latest part to get developed is the part of the brain that acts as primary decision maker/CEO/police officer. Much more could be written about this, but the bottom line for me is a reminder that brain development is a work-in-progress. If much development is taking place for the next two decades, I have to make sure I have reasonable expectations for what the brain can actually process and handle at this young age.

2. The physical and emotional exhaustion of a day has an effect.

As a grown adult, I can tend to get grumpy at times, typically when I’m tired, hungry, or just physically and emotionally exhausted. The good news is that I have 30-some years of experience in knowing how to appropriately deal with my bad attitude moments. My five-year-old is still learning how to do that. Michael Hyatt recently tweeted an article that outlined what most successful people do first thing in the morning. This excellent summary draws a highlight that perfectly applies to kids: Quoting Roy Baumeister and John Tierney, “Willpower, like a muscle, becomes fatigued from overuse.” They continue, “You have one energy resource that is used for all kinds of acts (of) self-control. That includes not just resisting food temptations, but also controlling your thought processes, controlling your emotions, all forms of impulse control, and trying to perform well at your job or other tasks. Even more surprisingly, it is used for decision making, so when you make choices you are (temporarily) using up some of what you need for self-control. Hard thinking, like logical reasoning, also uses it.”

Bottom line: At the end of a long day, I’ve used up a lot of energy and am exhausted. I’m not thinking my sharpest, I’m not the quickest, I’m not on my A-game. Neither is my kid. Do I need to help teach her how to work through this exhaustion? Of course. But in the day-to-day life, it’s important to adjust my expectations of her abilities, especially as the day goes on.

3. Every kid is different.

Comparing our kids to others is probably as old as parenting itself. And since the beginning of time, it’s been dangerous. When I see other kids doing things that my kids don’t, I need to not put them on a pedestal or mine on a development track. I need to celebrate what God has done in my kids and celebrate what He’s done in theirs. Every kid is different; that’s the beauty of life. If I see things that genuinely concern me, I need to take items 1 & 2 above to heart and realize that even those develop at different rates for different kids. There are a thousand factors that go into the mental, social, physical, and emotional development of kids. And each of those factors brings unique weight into the overall makeup of who each individual is. We should celebrate the individuality and not wonder why our kid isn’t like another in any given factor.

So what does all this mean? How do I apply this understanding to day-to-day parenting?

1. Figure out how my child is going to respond to me. Every day is a lesson in being a parent and being a child. If a given way of handling situations isn’t working, I need to be willing to adjust to a way that works for her developed state.
2. Adjust my expectations. This is a bigger challenge for some than it is for others. That’s okay. But I find that I need to continually evaluate when I’m feeling frustrated in any given parenting moment if the issue is my child’s response or my expectations? (The issue could be either – or both!)
3. Calm down. This world is way too frantic and stressed as it is. It’s a challenge enough to protect our kids from the frantic pace that we’re all accustomed to living in. The last thing I need to do is to get frazzled and respond in a quick or snappy way. Take a deep breath. Calm down. And think about all of the above.

Parenting expert Tim Elmore recently contributed to a Forbes.com article on raising children and he concluded with this great quote: “It’s important for parents to become exceedingly self-aware of their words and actions when interacting with their children, or with others when their children are nearby. Care enough to train them, not merely treat them to a good life. Coach them, more than coddle.”

My kids are young and I have a lot to learn. But I couldn’t agree more with Tim’s comments. And one thing I’m learning about great coaches is that they are intimately acquainted with their players’ skills and abilities, their emotions and their hot-buttons. As a parent, if I’m going to effectively train and coach my kids, it’s incumbent upon me to know all I can about my kids — their abilities, what wears on them, how they’re built, and how I should respond. 

What have you found to be helpful in dealing with the challenges of raising small kids?

 

Why I Am Excited About My Kids and Technology

Several weeks ago, my wife and I were at a concert. In the row in front of us sat a teenage girl and her mom. During intermission, mom was posting pictures on Facebook while her daughter was rolling her eyes at her mom on Facebook. At the same time, the girl held her phone close to her chest to check out snapchat out of mom’s line of sight. How challenging it is for this mom trying to be cool and connected while her teenage daughter seems to be in her own little tech world that mom likely knows nothing about.

And that’s the tricky thing about technology. Many of us are neck-deep in frustration over the power that technology has on our lives. Some of us are sick and tired of seeing families out to eat all staring at their phones, void of conversation. The internet is abuzz in people talking about getting a divorce from their cell phone or going through some form of digital detox. Yet, the power of technology and media is so pervasive that we just can’t seem to live without it. 

My kids are five and two and both of them know how to unlock my cell phone and get to their favorite apps. They enjoy their fair share of Amazon Instant video. My eldest looks at pictures on my phone and tells her sister that “she’s just posting some pictures on Facebook.” They are the essence of digital natives. Yet with all the infiltration of media in our lives, it is tempting to step back and have great concern for the future generation. “They’ll never know how to have a conversation,” we say. Or “do they even know how to write a handwritten note?” The short answer to both: yes, they will.

Here are three reasons I am personally excited about my kids and technology:

1. Access.

My kids have access to more data and information than any previous generation. As time goes on, even more will be at their disposal in even smaller ‘byte-size’ pieces. This access to information will help them be more connected to what’s happening in the world and, in turn, have a better view of the world as God sees it. In turn, I hope and pray that they do something with this access and make a difference in the neighborhood and among the nations.

2. Affordability. 

Historically, access to tools meant high price tags. My first computer cost nearly two thousand dollars and had a dial-up modem in it that I was certain I wouldn’t actually get around to using. My first cell phone cost several hundred dollars and was so fancy it had an alarm clock on it. Today, we have access to more information in the palm of our hand (soon to be on the watch strapped to our wrist) than ever before. And you can get it for virtually free. Access is good. Affordable access is better.

3. Application.

Access and affordability are only as good as our ability to rightly apply. More than hoping and praying that my kids do something with all of this, my wife and I plan to do all we can to rightly train them what to do with it all. This is where I am most excited about the age my kids are at right now. I’m rapidly approaching my mid-thirties. I’ve got a houseful of Apple devices, connected appliances, and do all I can to stay on top of social networking and all its quirks. Yet our family has had the unique challenge of bridging the gap between no access to this stuff to expensive access to affordable access. Our pendulum has swung from nothingness to a point where a cell phone ruled our lives. We’ve experienced every slice of enjoyment and frustration at what technology can do for us. And we’re continually getting closer to what we believe is a healthy midpoint. We’ve walked through the challenges of phones at the dinner table to making rules that they stay on the counter. We’ve dealt with the struggles of texting while driving to laws forbidding even talking on the phone while driving. And through all of this, we are working to establish healthy rules, boundaries, and appropriate application of technology in our lives. 

Fortunately (for us) our kids are young and aren’t yet involved with this stuff on a deeply personal basis. They don’t own cell phones, computers, or iPads. If our kids were five years older, I have no doubt it would be much harder to establish rules of what to do and not to do. (We would still do it, but it would be a tougher fight.) If we were all 15 years older, we as parents would likely be relying more on our kids to show us how to use all of these things. Yet we are old enough to learn on our own and they are young enough for us to effectively teach them appropriate application.

I’m not foolish enough to think we won’t have our fair share of battles over technology, cell phones, what to use, when and where. I’m not implying for a second that I’ll always have the upper hand on apps and all that’s available. Yet I’m also grateful and excited for the time in which we live and the fact that we have the great opportunity to not just figure out what all this tech stuff is, but to be in a great position to help our kids best grasp how to apply it in a God-honoring way.

Leaving an Inheritance

“A good person leaves an inheritance for his children’s children.”

Proverbs 13:22

What inheritance are you leaving?

How to improve your kids behavior

We’ve all experienced those moments where we wonder what on earth has gotten into our children…where we have no idea what they’re thinking or where their behavior has come from. We run through a checklist in our heads to try to determine the source of these misguided ways and, alas, we come up short. Today’s USA Today sheds a little light on a place we ought to consider:

The television.

I’ve written before about the impact of television on our kids (see ‘A Little TV Never Hurt Anybody…Right?‘ and ‘Is TV Consumption a Core Value?‘) And it doesn’t take long for us to realize if we plop our kids down in front of a screen it’s going to have some form of impact.

Yet even if we have a hard time peeling back the number of hours our kids spend in front of flickering pixels, we can adjust what those pixels portray. And that’s the essence of the USA Today article:

Swapping out violent TV programming for shows that are educational or have healthy behavioral messages can improve preschoolers’ behavior, a study finds.

Forget about violence alone. Just about every form of viewing is setting a model of how to act and behave. In our house, we have intentionally cut shows because of the content. My almost-five-year-old will quickly tell you that we don’t watch Caillou because he has a bad attitude. (Props to my wife for pulling the plug on that one.) We screen just about every show before we start watching. And with the ability to access scads of programming via Netflix and Amazon Prime, we’ve got to be even more diligent to check it before we watch it.

So; how can you improve your kid’s behavior? Keep being the parent. Make the decisions. Change the programming. Yes, they may fight and whine and complain and kick and scream and cry and fuss. But you’re the parent. You are in charge. Pull the plug.

Of course, this alone isn’t going to do it all. But given the ridiculous amount of time that many parents allow their kids to spend in front of a screen, it sure would be a step in the right direction.

How many hours a week do your kids spend in front of a screen? How would you describe the nature of the content?

How to pray with your toddlers

One of the common struggles we face as a parent is knowing how to pray. For some reason we fear that God might not hear us right. Or that we’ll sound silly. Or that people are listening in. When it comes to our kids, sometimes we just don’t know how to teach them to pray. And if they can’t talk yet, it seems almost fruitless to bother.

So how do we pray with our toddlers?

1. Just do it. Even if they can’t talk, even if they’re easily distracted, even if they don’t know what a prayer is or who God is. Just pray. Our 16 month-old sits at the table at every meal watching our family pray. As of late she’s started holding her hands before we start eating (they learn by watching) and now she even mumbles something that resembled “amen” at the end. Just pray. They’ll catch on eventually.

2. Make the times. Sure, we should “pray continually” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). But when it comes to kids, there are a few key times worth making sure prayer is a priority. We’ve found these to be around meals and at bedtime. The prayers don’t have to be super-long. Just make it a point to pray. We’ve found mealtimes a good time to do a standard prayer – “Come, Lord Jesus. Be our guest. Let these gifts to us be blessed. Amen.” The repetition will create a great platform for your child to learn a common family prayer. And bedtime is a great time to reflect on the blessings we’ve had throughout the day. With our almost-five year-old bedtime prayer is always a time of thanking God for some of the blessings of the day.

3. Model. Every once in a while we’ll take time with our kids to model a longer, more intentional prayer. Sure, kids have the attention span of a gnat, so this isn’t going to be twenty minutes of long, drawn-out, heart-pouring. But it’s also a good opportunity to pray intentionally about needs, other people, and the like. Kids are always listening. Let’s bring them into our holy moments with God. For if we don’t teach them, who will?

We’re not perfect. And we probably don’t pray as a family as often as we should. In fact, I’m sure we don’t. Yet we’re also not legalistic about how and when to pray. This is a time of communion – of fellowship – with God. When we connect directly with Him and can share any and all that’s on our minds. There’s no fancy formula and no such thing as a perfect prayer. As such, this provides a great platform to bring our kids into our spiritual lives and teach them how to pray.

What works for you? What seems to not work?

Fulfill Your Calling

“Constant contact with our Creator is essential to fulfill our calling.”

-Pete Wilson

Speaking at the D6 Conference, pastor and author Pete Wilson speaks openly and honestly about abiding in God – that each of us need to connect with, to abide with, our Creator. He issues this challenge – “constant contact with our Creator is essential to fulfill our calling.”

It’s left me wondering – how often do we try to work so hard to fulfill our calling at the expense of our connection with the Creator? This is true regardless of what your calling is. If you’re a pastor, a leader, a ministry worker, a stay-at-home mom, a work-at-home parent, a husband, a wife, etc. So often we are knee-deep in trying to live out what is on our plate each day that we’ve forgotten about the One who gave us the plate in the first place. This doesn’t matter what the calling is – if we are going to fulfill what God has created and designed and is calling us to do today, we must remain constantly connected to our Creator.

Do you feel overwhelmed? Do you feel stressed? Do you feel like you can’t do it each day? As a parent, do you feel like you don’t have what it takes? If you are a parent, then God wants you to be all in — to do it with all you’ve got. Yes, this is exhausting and tiring and stressful and painful. Yet He has given you this blessing of children and He will give you what you need to thrive in that very place. Yes, there are moments where you’re doing all you can to keep the ship afloat, and in those moments remember this truth that Wilson also provides:  “The same God of this universe who gave you this calling to begin with is the same one who is going to give you everything to accomplish the task that He’s called you do.”

Don’t get discouraged. Don’t be dismayed. Stay connected to your Creator. For He will provide all you need to not only survive, but to truly thrive in this calling He has given.

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For more information about Pete Wilson, follow him on Twitter at @pwilson or visit his Web site at http://withoutwax.tv/

For more information about the D6 Conference, visit http://www.d6conference.com/

On Blessing My Children : A Lesson Learned

Roughly 15 months ago, I was driving from Angola Prison to Baton Rouge, Louisiana. In the car was my friend Jeremy who had spent the weekend working with me at a men’s conference at the prison. On the phone was his eldest son whom he was eager to explain the intent of ministry in a prison, what a prison inmate is, what that means and what God has to say about all of it. To the best I can recall, that broad conversation was saved for another day. But this night had something special in store that has changed my parenting every since.

His boys were heading to bed for the night and each, one at a time, got on the phone and Jer blessed them. In just a few brief moments, he spoke life and truth, God’s Word and His promises, over his boys. They went to bed that night – as with every other night – having been both prayed for and healthfully confronted with God’s powerful truth.

As parents, we all have choices in the words we express to our children. In moments of overwhelming gratitude and grace, we tend to pour our words of affirmation. In times of stress and trial, we often cry out in exasperated tones. Yet through it all, our children must hear of our love for them, our desire for them to grow up in the Lord, and – most of all – our speaking God’s Truth into their lives.

Since that night last March, Robyn or I have spoken the truth of Numbers 6:24-26 to our girls nearly every night. It’s our honest prayer and our sincere hope for their lives.

Last night was a uniquely challenging one for me as I tucked our four year-old into bed, closed my eyes, and laid my hand on her shoulder to speak this blessing to her. Just the day before, I attended my friend Jeremy’s funeral. A life cut, by our standards, tragically short. (More on Jeremy and his life here; and my relationship with him here.) This friend and brother who taught me so much about life taught me this important thing about raising my kids well – and it wasn’t on purpose. We happened to just be in the right place at the right time together.

It makes me sad that he’ll not be able to speak this truth into his boys lives any longer. Yet I also know he was a faithful father who did more for his kids in the short time he had the opportunity to directly influence them with God’s Truth than many fathers do in an entire lifetime. I believe these years of blessing and his godly fathering will result in great fruit for his boys one day. They will be spiritual champions. I’m convinced of it.

One other thing I’m sure of? My kids have better parents because of Jer’s parenting, as well. His impact as a father extended beyond his own kin and onto others, like me, whom he touched. And the legacy is extended.

That prayer of blessing from the book of Numbers is one that I believe God has granted to Jeremy:

The LORD bless you
    and keep you;
the LORD make his face shine on you
    and be gracious to you;
the LORD turn his face toward you
    and give you peace.

Reflections on JE. Legacy. Life.

I’ve experienced the death of others before — older folks, even younger. But the passing of my friend Jeremy is the first time I’ve experienced the loss of someone so close to me (both in age and, simply, in life). I don’t think it’s an overstatement to say this will transform my life and my family’s. And I think the processing will continue to unfold for weeks…months…years?…to come. Yet when I process the rawness of today, I’m left feeling hopeful and overjoyed at what this brother has meant to me:

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Roughly 15 years ago I attended a national youth conference in Estes Park, Colorado where I met this guy who was part of the worship team. Admittedly, this event was the biggest thing I had ever been to and meeting someone who was on the big stage can have the tendency to leave one a little starstruck. We exchanged pleasant small talk and in hindsight I realize this guy was incredibly gracious to entertain random conversation from some fresh high school grad who was looking for some sort of connection to (perceived) fame. Nonetheless, he was a good musician and I was genuinely interested in the opportunity to bring him to my hometown to do a concert for our church. Little did I know then how that random conversation would change my life.

In due time, he would be in our area for a series of other concerts and he stopped by. Thus began a relationship that was stronger than business – though I helped launch his first Web site (man, it was awful), took care of a few bookings, and lined him up for several gigs over the past decade; it was stronger than friendship – we were there for each others’ weddings, spent plenty of nights on each others’ sofas when passing through town, and he constantly sharpened my thinking of life and ministry; and oddly stronger than family – no gathering was obligatory or forced; we didn’t have to spend time together, it was a privilege and a joy.

He’d come to town, unroll his sleeping bag on my bedroom floor and call it “home” for days at a time. Never a suitcase, always a duffel bag, his black Chevy Beretta would naturally find its way into our driveway when rolling through Northern Illinois. We’d make several trips to Monmouth, Illinois together where my bride-to-be was attending college, hosting more shows and, here again, not just doing shows but being one of the friends.

We’d develop a budding friendship that would extend into my entire family. We’d write, print, and mail early support letters for “Dock Crew Music Ministries”, play backyard football at Thanksgiving (being careful not to break the fingers of one whose livelihood depended on them) and enjoy summer night grilled food.

Eventually, we’d each move on to new seasons and new stages. Jer would take Jen as his bride and I would take Robyn as mine. We’d both find ourselves in tuxes for the occasions and I’ll still remember him asking me to “ush” his wedding as he wanted all his guys to be involved and decked out. (What an honor to me, as I knew his friendships closer to home were likely deeper and certainly greater in number than this one guy from northern Illinois.) He’d experience health struggles and cancer and, a few hundred miles away and inexperienced in such significant life issues, I would feel mute and helpless. Yet he was gracious and, seemingly, understanding. We would each have kids and our opportunities to work together would be … different. Our families would try to connect as much as possible, which would simply never be often enough. Nonetheless, we’d continue to look for every chance to continue to be involved in the stuff that was not only worthwhile but just plain fun.

From those first early concerts, which were more like gatherings than shows, grew bunches of opportunities that would shape my experiences and my life to this day. When launching into the venture of concert promotion, I could think of no one more gracious to help me learn the ropes. He opened for our first “real” show, Nichole Nordeman (an equally gracious individual, for whom the word “artist” is an understatement) and was there for future gigs at the church I worked at. He was eager to move beyond shows and spend weekends in uncomfortable places – cabins, hotels, and hostels – being not only a worship leader, but a strong spiritual underpinning in my early youth ministry days (when I really didn’t have a clue what I was doing). On my last youth retreat with a church, he was there every step of the way until sickness nailed his body and landed him an ambulance ride to the nearest ER – not really what he signed up for when he agreed to join us on this trip. Weeks later I’d get a thank-you card in the mail, thanking me for the way we handled all that. (Thanking me? What?)

As my working life would emerge and mature, we’d still find new opportunities to work together…

When faced with a unique challenge of bringing a worship leader in to transform the stale nature of a conference I was newly responsible for, I could think of no one better than Jeremy Erickson to balance the sensitivities of history and future. In later years he would come back to speak at the same conference, delivering equal sharpness in mind – this time with proclamation in word rather than song.

When looking for someone to contribute to a panel discussion for a youth ministry training video, Jeremy’s experience and perspective was the perfect fit to round out the team.

When needing to record and produce audio for a men’s conference inside a prison, we needed someone with experience and sensitivity to a unique environment. Jeremy was our guy, and though legal constraints have kept us from releasing this project, the handful who have listened have expressed that it’s one of the powerful products they’ve have the honor of listening to.

When heading to Minnesota for anything work-related, we’d always try to grab some conversation and a cup of coffee together. (Why on earth did he let me settle for Starbucks when we were in Caribou country?!) Despite the fact that Robyn and I have extended family in Minnesota, it’s the network of friends we’ve built over the years – with the Ericksons as a hub, that make us feel like the Twin Cities are a second hometown for us.

It’s hard for me to believe it’s been 15 years since first meeting Jeremy on a trail in Estes Park, Colorado. And it’s hard to realize so much time has passed since I popped backstage to strike up a conversation. Was it presumptuous of me to be so bold? Perhaps. But is my life different because of that interchange? Absolutely. And it’s not because I had the boldness to strike up a conversation. It’s because Jer had the grace to listen.

These days I find myself working full time in a ministry that focuses on addressing the national, and international, epidemic of fatherlessness. We focus all our energy on helping men become godly fathers despite their circumstances. We challenge men and families to build a legacy. Not passed-down heritage. But well-lived legacy. Indeed, the passing of my friend leaves on this earth a beautiful bride and three adorable boys. They now leave the Church with an opportunity to do what it was designed to do. [James 1:27]

Literally tens (perhaps hundreds) of thousands of lives have been touched by Jeremy’s music and message over the past couple decades. Yet the irony for a guy like Jer is that what leaves a legacy aren’t the CDs or the mp3s of his messages. It’s not the pictures or the autographs. The legacy is in the man who he was – and, in glory, I believe, still is. While it was that perceived “fame” that drew me to this guy a decade and a half ago, it’s a life well-lived that has really left a mark. Yes, there are more stories and they are good ones. Yet they all weave together to make up what is really left behind – legacy. Legacy is not built by fame. It’s in life and experience. It’s in purpose and joy. It’s in loving and living – fully living! – in the Author’s story.

Fame is for the Maker

Not for mortal man

Who stumble over praises bigger than

The kingdoms they’ve created

The kingdoms given them

By we who long for those who comprehend

What it is we have discovered

What it is we’re looking for

A larger life than the little life we’ve lived

We fill a barren grove with starlight

And the grove is empty still

We need more than what these halls of fame can give

…

But in You I find the writer

And in You I find the song

And I’ve a feeling life was meant to be this way

I’ve a feeling love was meant to be this way*

 

Here’s the kicker — Jer is still living the story – today. Yes, today! The story is not over, it’s still being written. Only now, he’s not in a bed, not taking meds, not struggling to strum. He’s running around, enjoying a feast, and playing an axe much nicer than anything Taylor could ever even hope to manufacture.

In all of this, there is hope. There is joy. There is more life. And there is more love.

 

*Jeremy Erickson, Track: Far Away and Famous, Album: To Entertain. 2003. http://jeremyerickson.bandcamp.com/track/far-away-and-famous

 

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If you do not know this man or his music, check out http://www.jeremyerickson.com

If you don’t know his most recent journey, check out their CaringBridge site: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/jeremyerickson